Forgotten Life
by Deathbringer88
Summary: (Astra Curtis female version of Ponyboy.) she is jumped by Soc's. goes by the plot of the book but instead Astra gets badly injured and loses her memory. She is in a critical condition and gets very sick. Will she get better or will her life be condemned to eternal sleep? Rated M for Violence, attempted rape and murder.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: I do not own Outsiders. It is an amazing book but I do not own anything but the character Astra and the sequence/plot of the story. Enjoy.**

Chapter 1: introduction.

My name is Astra Curtis, I am a Greaser and proud of it. All though I am a little different from the other Greasers. I have extremely long black hair and eyes bluer than the sea. I look completely different from the rest of my family.

Both my parents died in an auto wreck, so I live with my two older brothers Sodapop and Darry. Darry is six-feet-two, and broad-shouldered and muscular. He has dark-brown hair that kicks out in front and a slight cowlick in the back(just like dad's) but Darry has his own eyes. They are like two pieces of pale green ice. they've got a determined set to them, just like the rest of him. He looks older then his age and he'd be real handsome if his eyes weren't so cold. Soda is a happy-go-lucky boy always wearing a huge Cheshire grin. He is immensely handsome but not like a Darry handsome, like a movie-star handsome, the kind that makes passers-by stop mid-stride to watch him walk by. He isn't as tall as Darry and he is slimmer, but he has a finely drawn sensitive face that somehow is reckless and thoughtful at the same time. He has dark-gold hair that turns wheat-gold in the sun. He has lively dark-brown eyes that can be gentle and sympathetic one moment an bursting with rage the next. He has our dad's eyes and can get drunk on happiness and plain living.

My brothers and i were in a gang. Not a wild one, really just a group of kids that have known each other since forever. In our gang their is:

Steve Randle who is seventeen, tall and lean with thick greasy hair which he kept combed in complex swirls. He is cocky, smart and has a specialty with cars.

Two-bit Matthews was the oldest of our gang and the wisecracker of the whole group. He is about six feet tall, stocky in build, grey eyes an a huge amount of pride for his rusty coloured sideburns. He also wore a wide grin, not exactly like Soda's but similar.

Dallas Winston(Dally) was the real character of he gang. He had an elfish face high cheekbones, pointed chin, small, sharp animal teeth and ears like a lynx. His hair was so blonde it was white and he hated haircuts an oil so it fell over his forehead in wisps, then kicked out at the back in tufts. He has eyes that are blue, blazing ice, cold with hatred for the world.

Johnny Case was the last of the gang, second youngest next to me. He was smaller then the rest of the sixteen year old boys with a slight build. He has jet black hair like me but his was heavily greased and combed to one side. He has a nervous, suspicious look in his eyes that he earned from the Soc's and his parents.

The term 'Greaser' is used to class all us teens on the East Side of the River. We are the lower class of human here at the River. We are poorer then the rest. Especially the Soc's. No Greaser walks alone these days., especially the girls. Soc's are always on the prowl ready to jump us Greasers. I've never walked alone since Johnny was jumped. He had it real bad. Us an the gang were used to seeing Johnny beat and bruised. His dad clobbered him a lot and it made us but especially me madder than heck. But we couldn't do anything about it. His beatings were nothing like when he was jumped. Hi face was cut up, bruised and swollen. There was a huge, deep gash running from his temple to his cheek. He would carry that scar until the day he died. He was drenched with his own blood. Soda had called out to him and after a while he replied quietly "there was a whole bunch of them, a blue mustang full... I got scared..." He tried to act tough but he suddenly burst out crying. I had seen Johnny take a whipping with a two-by-four from his old man but he never let out a whimper. It made it worse for all of us to see him break now. I bent down and wrapped my arms around him.

"It's okay johnnycake, there gone now. It's okay." I told him soothingly.

It wasn't just the fact that the Soc's had beaten Johnny half I death, it was the fact that they scared him. He was already high-strung from the beatings an arguments he got from his parents. If it was any other boy in our group it would have turned them bitter and rebellious but it was killing Johnny. He had never been a coward an he was a good fighter. He stuck up for us and kept his mouth shut around the cops but after the jumping he was skittish and I thought that he would never get over it. Johnny who is the most law-abiding out of all of us, now carries a six-inch switchblade. He'd use it too if anyone was foolish enough to jump him again. He'd kill them. But no one is ever going to beat him again. Not over my dead body.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: my jumping:

I was walking home just coming from watching a movie in the movie house when I spotted a red Corvair trailing me. I am almost to my house only about 12 houses from home so I started walking a little faster even though I knew it was no use. If only I could get home before they got out of the car. The Corvair pulled up beside me and five burly Soc's jumped out. 'Crap' I thought. I'm taller than most fourteen year olds, I look about sixteen but those guys were so much more bigger than me. I automatically went into auto-pilot walking faster and faster wondering if I would get away if I made a run for it. A picture of Johnny's cut up face entered my mind. I didn't want that so I picked up my pace but I felt a fist weave into my long hair and pull back roughly. I let out a scream. If I could scream loud enough Soda and Darry might come running. I screamed again but got a rough punch across my jaw. I was pushed to the ground and dragged behind an abandoned house were I was thrown into a wall. I lay in the ground trying to regain focus. The boys surrounded me, they were grinning and goofing around, pushing each other around. I felt two hands grab mine and tie them behind my back. Another guy was sitting on my chest and I couldn't breath properly. I could smell English Leather shaving lotion and stale tobacco . I wished foolishly that I would suffocate in that smell before they did anything. My mind was racing and all I could think to do was scream. So I did. I screamed for Soda, Darry and to anyone who would listen. I was slogged across the face a couple of times and a switchblade was held to my throat. The cool, sharp metal pierced my skin and the warm feeling of blood flowed down my neck. Between gasps I swore at them using every curse I knew under then sun. Another boy put his hand over my mouth and I bit down as hard as I could, I didn't let go until I tasted blood in my mouth. He cursed and using his other hand (which was covered in expensive rings) he punched the side of my head repeatedly. He drew another switchblade and held it close to my face.

I panicked and started squirming and screaming. I felt the side of my face fill with pain as it was sliced up brutally. I screamed again but in return I was slogged. I could here one of the boys yelling "shut her up, FOR PETE'S SAKE SHUT HER UP!"

A dirty handkerchief was shoved into my mouth. My was was spinning and my body tensed when I felt two hands roaming over my body. I was incapable of doing anything. I felt dirty and disgusting as the boys each took a turn to disgrace me. A pounding sound was growing and getting closer. The Soc's jumped up and left me lying there bleeding and half-clothed. All around my the Soc's were running and jumping over me. I was way to dizzy to figure what was happening then someone slipped their arms around me and lifted me off the ground. My head span so fast that I blacked out.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: jump aftermath

I awoke in my bed. Six faces staring at me. I rubbed my eyes trying to get them to open properly.

"Wha..what? Where am I?" I asked dazed.

"Your home now Azzy." I heard Soda say. I nodded and relaxed.

"I..I thought the Soc's got me." I whispered. Tears forming in my eyes.

"They did." Steve's voice said to me. I turned and my eyes met with Steve Randle's. "We found you on the floor bleeding. You weren't even clothed properly." On the last sentence his voice cracked. I knew how much I meant to the gang and I knew that they felt responsible for what happened.

"Was I... Did they.."I began but I couldn't bring myself to say it.

"We don't know." Two-bit said worriedly. I frowned and slumped back down.

"I...am...so...stupid!" I cried. "I didn't think..."

"You don't ever think," Darry said from his spot in the arm chair. "not at home or anywhere were it counts. You must think at school with all those good grades you bring home, and you've always got your nose in a book, but do you ever use your head for common sense? No siree Azz. Even if you did have I go by yourself, you shoulda carried a blade." I just stared at my hands trying not I boys have never seen my cry an I'm not about to let them.

"Leave her alone Darry she's been through a lot tonight." Soda jumped in.

"Don't ya go tellin' me what ta do Soda.." Darry began.

"Get out." I said staring at Darry and Soda.

"What?" Darry asked.

"I said get out." I told him pointing to the door. He just looked at me.

"...no..." He said. I flung back my blanket and tried to stand but my legs were too bruised and sore to stand so I flopped onto the ground, hard. Darry stepped forward to help me up.

" !" I yelled. He flinched back surprised. I have never yelled at anyone before. Slowly and silently everyone walked it of the room and as soon as they all had left I lay on the floor and sobbed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Auhor's note: ~FL~ is Mille another chapter but not. Y'all know what I mean? It's like a enjoy:)**

Chapter 4: ordinary day.

I awoke on the floor. My neck screaming in pain from sleeping in an awkward position. I guess I scared the boys when I yelled because I could tell not one of the had been into my room after that.

I used my bed as a support and hauled myself up. I took a few wobbly steps then let go. I could walk but my legs seemed like they we in shock. Using the walls I made my way to the kitchen were all the boys were. As soon as I emerged all conversation stopped.

"H-how bad is it?" I asked them. Two-bit got up picked up my mother's old hand mirror. He gave it to me and I held it up to my face. I was cut up real bad on my face and neck and I had multiple black bruises on my face. "Oh..." I whispered. Soda came up and gave me a hug

"It'll be alright." He said.

~FL~

I hopped into bed after yet another heated conversation with Darry. I don't know why but I felt as if he didn't love me. He is always hollering at me and not once has he ever hollered at Soda.

I was just about to turn my lights off when i heard a knock on my door.

"Hey." Soda said.

"Hey." I replied sleepily. He yawned and sat down next to me on the bed and threw an arm over me.

"Listen kiddo, when Darry hollers at you... He don't mean nothin'. He's just got more worries than somebody his age ought to. Don't take him too seriously...you dig Azz? Don't let him bug you. He's really proud of you 'cause your so brainy. It's just cause your the baby, I mean he loves you a lot. Savvy?" He said sleepily.

"Sure." I said, "Soda?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks." I said smiling. He patted my back.

"Hey Azz."

"Hmm?" i turned to face him.

"Don't tell Darry, but I'm thinkin' of marrying Sandy." He said to me smiling. "After she gets out of school and I get a better job and everything. I might wait till you get outta school, though. So I can still help Darry with the bills 'n stuff."

I smiled up at him. "It's good cause I reckon you ain't never gonna find another girl like Sandy. Anyway wait till I get out so you am keep Darry of my back."

"Don't be like that kid. I told ya he don't mean half of what he says..." Soda began.

"What's it like?" I interrupted.

"What's what like?" He asked.

"Being in love?" I replied.

"Hmmm." He thought, "It's like magic." He sighed.

"I can't wait to fall in love." I whispered. He smiled and ruffled my hair.

~FL~

"Hey , I'm walking over to the Nightly Double tomorrow night. Anyone wanna come?" Dallas called out, beside me Steve shook his head,

"Me and Soda are pickin' up Evie an Sandy for the game."

Darry sighed, "I'm working tomorrow night."Dally looked to the rest of us,

"How bout y'all? Two-bit? Johnnycake? Wada bout you Astra?"

"Johnny and i'll come." I said. Behind me Johnny nodded. "That okay Darry?" I asked.

"Yeah, since it ain't a school night."Darry was real good about letting me go out on weekends but on weekdays I could hardly get out of the house.

"I was plannin' on getting boozed up tomorrow night." Two-bit said. "If I don't, I'll walk over and find y'all." I laughed, you could never tell if two-bit was boozed up and if he wasn't. He acted like he was even when he was sober.

~FL~

Darry was waiting for Johnny and I under the street light at the corner of Pickett and Sutton, and since we got there early, we had time to go over to the drugstore in the shopping centre and good around. We bought cokes and annoyed the waitress, and walked eyeing things that were out in the open until the manager got wise to us and suggested we leave. He was too late though; Dally walked out with two packages of Kool under his jacket.

Then we went across the street and down Sutton a little way to The Dingo. There are lots of drive-ins in town. The Soc's go to The Way Out and Rusty's but us greasers go to The Dingo's and to Jay's. The Dingo is a pretty rough hangout, there's always a fight going on and once a girl got shot.

We killed some time doing stuff until it was dark enough to sneak over the back fence. The Nightly Double was the biggest drive-in in town it shows two movies a night and on weekends it shows four. We had money to get in but Dally hated doing things the legal way. That's why he's always in trouble with the Fuzz.

We went to the rows of seats in front of the concession stand to sit down. There was only two other people there. A red-headed and a brunette both girls. Dally eyed the cooly and sat down rift behind them. I had a funny feeling that Dally was up to his usual tricks again. And as usual I was right. He began talking real loud so they could hear.

He started out bad and got real worse. Dallas could talk awful dirty when he wanted to, I guess he wanted to tonight. I felt my ears get hot. Johnny and I left hastily to get cokes. When we got back Dally had his feet on the red-heads chair and he was talking real loud now. She turned around real fast and yelled.

"Take your feet off my chair and shut your trap!"

Dally merely looked at her, "who's gonna make me?" He asked naughtily.

"You better leave us alone, Greaser. Or I'll call the cops." She hissed. Dally just looked bored.

"Oh my, my you ought to see my record some time hot stuff, it's bout a mile long. Betcha can't guess what I've been in for."

"Please leave us alone. Why don't you be nice and leave us alone?" She said.

Dally grinned roguishly, "I'm never nice. Want a coke?"

The red-head was mad as heck now. "I wouldn't drink it if I was dying in the desert! Get lost Greaser!" The way she said it was worse than when any other Soc says it. Her voice was dripping with hate and disgust. I got real mad then. I walked up to her and grabbed her by the shirt collar,

"Don't you ever talk to Dally like that! You her me? You little bitch." I spat. I let go of her collar and she looked at me as if I had slapped her. She tried to regain he cool,

"What's he to you?" She hissed,

"Family." I spat back. After that I turned and saw Dally and Johnny with their mouths hanging open. I was about to say something when the sound of clapping rang through the air.

"Good on ya Azz." Two-bit came up to us smiling. I blushed,

"Ain't nobody gonna talk to my family that way." I said.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Leaving.

After the movie had finished Dally and Two-bit walked home and Johnny offered to walk me home. I accepted and we walked towards my house.

"I can't believe you yelled at that Soc." Johnny said.

"Yeah well it ain't right calling us Greasers. We ain't no different were just a little poorer." I said stuffing my hands in my pockets.

"You cold?" Johnny asked.

"Little bit." I sighed. What he did next surprised me. He put his arm on my shoulder and pulled me close. We walked like that for a while then a blue Mustang pulled up beside us and four Soc's jumped out.

"Watta we got here?" One of them snarled.

"A couple of greasers." Another laughed. One of the bigger boys came out and stood about 30cm away from me.

"So i heard you threatened my girl." He said looking at me.

"I didn't I just called her a bitch." I said cooly. He looked at me ferociously. Johnny pulled me behind him.

"There ain't gonna be any fighting tonight." He said sternly. "We are just gonna walk the rest of the way home and not bother your girl again okay?" I nodded. For some reason the Soc's just let us walk away. But I had a feeling they'd be back.

Johnny and I didn't walk home straight away. We took a turn into a street. Johnny light a cigarette and sat down. I sat next to him.

"Thanks for not letting the Soc's bet me up again." I said.

"Hey, just like you said, ain't nobody gonna hurt my family." He said. I laughed.

"You know Astra, I-I..." He began.

"Yeah what is it?" I asked.

"This is nice." The smiled. I frowned,

"What?"

"This." He said, "You and me just chillin'. It's nice." I smiled.

We talked for ages until I fell asleep.

~FL~

"Astra." Johnny said shaking me. "Astra wake up."

I sat up, shivering. The stars had moved. "Glory, Johnny what time is it?" I asked sleepily.

"I dunno. I went to sleep to. Listening to you breathing. You'd better get home. I think I'll stay all night out here." He said. His parents didn't are if he came home or not.

"Okay." I yawned stretching my arms. "But if you get cold please come inside." He nodded.

"I will."

I ran home. Trembling at the thought of facing Darry. The porch light was on. Maybe they were asleep and I could sneak in. I peeked in the window. Soda was sprawled out on the couch asleep but Darry was in the arm chair reading the newspaper. I swallowed and opened the door quietly. Darry glanced up from his paper and was on his feet in a second.

"Where the heck have you been? Do you even know what time it is?" He yelled, he was madder then I'd seen him in a long time. I shook my head. "Well it's two in the morning kiddo. Another hour and I would have called the cops. Where were you Astra?" His voice was rising. "Where in the almighty universe were you?!"

"I-I feel asleep in the lot..." I stammered.

"You WHAT?" Darry was yelling now, Soda sat up and rubbed his eyes.

"Hey Azz, where ya been?" He asked sleepily.

"I didn't mean to." I pleaded with Darry. "I was walking home with Johnny and we were talking and then we both fell asleep."

"I reckon it never occurred to you that your brothers might be worrying their heads off and afraid to call the police because something like that could get you and Soda thrown into a foster care home so quick it would make your head spin." Darry yelled. "And you were asleep with Johnny? Astra, what on earth is the matter with you?! Can't you use your head? You haven't even got a coat on!" I felt hot tears of anger and frustration welling up in my eyes.

"I said I didn't mean to..."

"I didn't mean to.!" Darry shouted I was trembling with fright, Darry had never gotten this mad before. "I didn't think, I forgot! That's all I hear outta you. Can't you think of anything?" He yelled and I felt the tears begin to spill.

"Darry..." Sodapop began but Darry turned on him.

"You keep your tap shut! I'm sick and tired of hearin' you stand up for her!"

He should never yell at Soda. Nobody should. He was a good guy, always sticking up for everyone.

"Don't you yell at him!" I screamed at Darry. Darry wheeled around fast and slapped me across the face so hard that I fell to the floor. It was suddenly deathly quiet. We had all frozen. Nobody in the family had ever hit me before. Soda was wide-eyed. Darry looked at the palm of his hand were it turned red and then looked at me. His eyes were huge.

"Astra.." He began shocked. But I shook my head continuously feeling the hot tears fall down my cheeks. I got up and ran out the door and down the street as fast as I could. Behind me I could hear Darry screaming, "ASTRA! I DIDNT MEAN TO!" But I pretended not to hear him. I was running away. It was plain to me that Darry didn't want me around, and I wouldn't stay even if he did. He wasn't ever going to hit me again.

"Johnny?" I called, startled when he rolled over and jumped up almost under my feet. "Come on, we're running away." Johnny asked no questions. We ran for several blocks until we were out if breath. Hen we walked I was crying by then. I finally sat down in the curb and cried, burying my face in my arms. Johnny sat beside me one arm over my shoulder.

Easy Astra, we'll be okay." He cooed. I finally calmed down and whiped my eyes on my sleeve.

"Johnny, I'm scared." I sobbed.

"Well don't be. Your scaring me. What happened anyways?"

"Darry...h-hit me." I said showing him my red face. He rubbed my back.

"Come on, lets go for a walk see if you can calm down enough to go home." He said quietly. I nodded and he helped me up.

~FL~

The park was about two blocks square, with a fountain in the middle and a swimming pool for the little kids. The pool was empty now in he fall, but the fountain was going merrily. Tall elm trees made the park shadowy and dark, and it would have been a good hangout, but we preferred our vacant lot, and the Shepard outfit liked the alleyways down by the tracks, so the park was left to lovers and little kids.

Nobody was around at two-thirty in the morning, and it was a good place to relax and cool off. But I couldn't have gotten much cooler without turning into a Popsicle. Johnny snapped up his jeans jacket and flipped up the collar.

"You cold?" He asked

"Yes!" I said. He shrugged off his jacket again and put it around me. "Thanks Johnny." He reached his hand out and brushed a few stray hairs away from my face. He leaned in closer to my face. A sudden blast of a car horn made us both jump. The blue Mustang was circling the park slowly. Johnny swore under his breath.

"What do they want? This is our territory. What are Soc's doing so Far East?" He muttered.

"I dunno. But I bet there looking for us after what I did to the Soc girl. I whispered. "Want to run of it?"

"It too late now. Look, here they come." Johnny said. Five Socs were coming straight at us, and from the way they were staggering I figured they were reeling pickled. That scared me. A cool deadly bluff could sometimes shake them off, but not if they outnumbered you five to two and were drunk. Johnny's hand went to his back pocket and pulled out his switchblade. How I wished I still had that broken bottle.

Usually Johnny would be scared to death. His face would be white as a ghost and his eyes would be wild-looking like they always were when he was scared. He wasn't tonight. He had a determined look in his eyes and he stood with his switchblade at the ready.

I recognised the face of the bigger Soc. "Your outta your territory." Johnny snarled in a low voice. I was surprised by the confidence in his voice. "You better watch it." He warned.

"Nah pal, yer the ones who better watch it, 'specially the white trash with long hair next to ya." The lead Soc said. I felt all colour drain from my face. I have been sworn and cussed at but nothing struck me like that just did. Johnny swore and ran for straight for the lead Soc. They punched him in the face hard.

"STOP!" I screamed. And ran at the lead Soc trying to punch him, but his two bodyguards grabbed me an tried to pull me away. I fought to get to him. Then, because I couldn't think of anything else, I spat at him.

He shook his head slowly, smiling. "You could use a bath Greaser. And a good working over and we've got all night to do it. Give the kid a bath David." I tried to run but David caught me by the back if my neck and shoved my face into the fountain. I tried to fight but his hand was strong on the back of my neck. I had to hold my breath. But I couldn't hold it forever. I couldn't hold it any longer. i fought again desperately but only sucked in water. I'm drowning. This time they've gone too far. A red haze filled my mind and I felt my eyes grow heavy. The next thing I knew I was pulled out of the fountain and I was thrown onto the pavement. I was coughing madly trying to get the water out of my lungs. I was picked up again and held by the collar by David. Boy he was ugly.

In front of me three Soc's were holding Johnny back. I felt David wrap his arm around my waist. "What are you doing?!" I shrieked. Johnny grew wild and I saw that he was getting harder to hold back.

"Oh so you don't like us touching your white trash?" He asked Johnny cheekily. Johnny thrashed against them harder trying to get free. David turned me around and gripped my shoulders real hard. He lowered his face to mine and kissed me real hard. It was disgusting and wet. I hit him hard trying to get free but he jut kept kissing me. I think Im going to throw up. Johnny got free and ran at David with his switchblade. The next thin I knew David was on the ground with a switchblade in his chest and the rest of the Soc's were fleeing from the park. I looked at Johnny, his eyes wider then I had ever seen them.

"I-I killed him." He said in disbelief. David was lying there in the moonlight, a dark pool of blood forming around him. Johnny walked up to him and reefed the switchblade out of his chest, it was red up to the hilt. My stomach jumped violently and I felt my throat grow hot.

"Johnny, I-I think I'm going to be sick." I whimpered.

"Go ahead, I won't look." He said and looked away. After I had finished being sick I leaned back an closed my eyes so I didn't have to see David.

"So, you really killed him?"

"Yeah." Johnny said his voice shaky. "I had to. They were drowning you and kissing you. And they had a blade, I can't stand seeing other people kiss you Azz...I-I love you." He said. I looked up at him. His black hair falling into his eyes. I got up and hugged him.

"I love you too Johnnycake." I said.


End file.
